Dark tunnels

When you are following the Lord, you never know what’s ahead or what’s in store for you. We don’t receive a map; we aren’t given directions; we aren’t shown ahead of time what the journey will look like. We are simply called to follow; to trust the One who guides our every step. I wouldn’t just follow anyone, but I would follow my Daddy because I know He’s kind and loving and knows where we are going, even if I don’t. Corrie ten Boom once said, “When a train goes through a tunnel and it gets dark, you don’t throw away the ticket and jump off. You sit still and trust the engineer.” There have been plenty of times on this journey I felt like I was going through a dark tunnel. You can start to doubt and question yourself, “Did I take a wrong turn somewhere? How did I end up here? I think I may be lost.”

Its been a pretty long tunnel so far this year but I’ve tried to remain calm and trust the engineer. I didn’t expect to be living out of a suitcase for 3 months and not having a permanent home. None of us expected the turn in the road in finding out Mike had cancer and our fellow missionaries moving back to the States. I didn’t expect to find myself ready to pack up and move home myself after just a year and a half on the mission field. But, as always, God is not surprised by anything and has a plan and a purpose for the tunnels. The past two months of bends in the road have strengthened the relationship I have with the Guide, learning how to walk by faith in new ways and trust Him. (Side note: as a Christian, you never “arrive” at a place where you’ve learned the lesson and move on. You always need reminding and there’s always room to grow and to understand more!) So yes, I STILL need to learn and practice how to walk by faith and not sight. God is so faithful. There is an end and purpose to every trial (1 Peter 5:10). The wheat isn’t threshed forever (Isaiah 28:28). And, those who put their trust in the Lord will not be put to shame! (Probably my favorite verse in the whole Bible: Psalm 25:3.)

Last week, I was struggling under a weight of pressure and anxiety approaching the end of the month and still not having a place to go. I had gone to see a few apartments but had no peace about any of them and felt like I was going to be forced to choose one just because of deadlines. After praying about my situation, a dear friend from the States called me and said she’d been praying for me and asked if there were any updates to my situation. I told her all about my stress and confusion with all the different options. She said she felt it upon her heart to send me a financial gift to help my situation. As we talked, it came out that the best option I had was to stay exactly where I am currently in the apartment that Mike and Shelley left (fully furnished). I had day dreamed about being able to just stay where I am but knew I could never afford the rent. But with her financial gift, and the gifts of a few others, the Lord showed me that it was enough to stay here and pay the rent for the next six months. (This may not sound like a long time but when you’re a missionary living one day by faith at a time, six months sounds like a lifetime!) The more I prayed about making this decision, the more peace I had and the anxiety faded. I will continue to look and pray for a roommate come September or exactly what the situation will look like then. Until then, I have a spare room if anyone would like to visit!

*Praises-After talking to my landlords about staying, they even lowered the rent for me! The last Sunday before Mike and Shelley left for the States, our landlord Gabrielle and his wife Anna came to church and sat through the service. Ever since then, Anna has been coming consistently. They are not believers. Their lives were clearing impacted by knowing Mike and Shelley; a relationship that I hope to continue to develop by staying here.

On that note, please remember our friends Mike and Shelley Kardos in your prayers as they continue the cancer battle in the States. You can read about their journey and prayer request on their blog here.

(Our farewell potluck to Mike for Mike and Shelley before they moved back to the States)

On Easter Sunday we will celebrate the resurrection of our Savior at Calvary Chapel Roma with a demonstration of a biblical dinner. It was a fun and unique experience when we did it last year and we are hoping it will be something of interest to our invited non-believing friends. Easter Sunday is usually one of two Sundays a year that most people prioritize attending church. Join us in praying for our service this year to not only bless our church family, but also tug at the hearts of the non-believers we’ve invited to join us. Pray that God would put it on peoples hearts to join us and to use this service to reveal Himself to them.

(Stuffing Easter eggs with candy in preparation for an outdoor egg hunt!)

I have started another semester of classes at church, adding a second English class to my plate. I’m excited to see Asia and Laura return for the fourth time to my English class and to see two new girls come to sewing. I feel like we are off to a good start and am enjoying the experience so far. I’m looking forward to watching these precious relationships continue to grow through these classes with hopes of sharing Christ with them. Be praying for Asia, Laura, and Nella (my English students, whom I’ve grown to love) to come to know Jesus; for the sewing classes to be a fun and enjoyable blessing; Miky and his guitar lessons; and for the wisdom and creativity I need for teaching.

Our young adults group has grown closer these past months and have begun practicing for a skit that we hope to use for outreach this summer. We’ve been praying about taking a team of us down to Sicily this summer to join up with Calvary Chapel Syracuse to do some outreach and bless the body of believers there. Any opportunity like this is a great platform for God to strengthen our faith, take us outside our comfort zones, and cause us to grow in Him and we are praying that there would be many of our young adults who are able to go and serve and grow through this experience. Please continue to pray for Luis and Tessa as they lead this group and this possible trip to come together how the Lord wants and for many of our group to be available and have the means to go.

(Our very talented Tessa drew these for each member of our YA group to remember that our God is Yaweh-Jireh or God Provides…can you guess which one is mine?)

*A personal and grateful thank you to everyone who has been praying specifically for my living situation and provision. I am delighted to confirm that God is faithful and provides for our needs!

Buona Pasqua!

To donate, click here.